Dear Friends,
At a local death cafe, one of the humans in attendance shared with me a book that I wanted to recommend to you. It’s called When Children Grieve: For Adults to Help Children Deal with Death, Divorce, Pet Loss, Moving, and Other Losses by John W. James and Russell Friedman. It speaks about all forms of loss that a child might experience from the loss of a loved one or a pet, to moving to a new house and a new school.
The thing that really jumped out at me was how it goes through the various myths about grieving and/or bad advice that is given to grievers. This includes:
don’t feel bad
replace the loss
grieve alone
be strong
keep busy
time heals all wounds
All of these are things that people say to us, perhaps thinking that it is helping. We hear it and then often convince ourselves that it's the truth. My hope is that by reading each myth at a time, it will maybe help us to not believe them. This book also helps to teach some true and helpful techniques.
This book may be especially helpful for parents who navigate a lot when a death occurs. They need to navigate their own grief while trying to help their kids navigate theirs as well. That is incredibly difficult to do.
This book will hopefully be helpful and comforting to those interested in reading it. Because focus can be a challenge during times of grief, I want to mention that it's also available in audiobook. Listening to it might be easier than reading the print book.
For those who need to hear this right now--you are loved and there are people looking to support you.
Don’t forget to put your own oxygen mask on first!
Jennifer
---
Jen Thompson is a graduate of HHA's Death Doula certificate program as well as an HHA infant and pregnancy loss doula candidate. You can learn more about Jen by following her Instagram page @withdignity_deathdoula.
Comments